Smells like victory

Let's face it: Men are kinda stinky. And as a writer, I often face the difficult task of describing my heroes in aromatic and appetizing terms that don't involve old food, paint thinner, or garbage days in the summer.

Women have more acute senses of smell. It's a fact. And (most) men try to appeal to that acute sense with various products. Try, and fail.

The worst offenders seem to be those who believe dousing themselves in Axe will actually produce advertised results.

Guys: It really doesn't do that to us. If you insist on using it since you bought five cans of it while it was on sale, go easy. Nothing turns a girl off more than a fog of deodorant. Seriously, the only reason all those jubblies are headed for that douchebag on the beach is to make him stop polluting the environment.

Now here's a product we might get behind:

Old Spice, for many, brings us fond memories of our fathers and grandfathers aftershave, that little ceramic bottle with the boat on it. Not only does it appeal to our Elektra complex, but it smells nice, too. The guy randomly being on a horse doesn't hurt, either.

Really, though, all us girls want is a guy who showers regularly, who eats right, who does laundry on a frequent basis, and who wears a little anti-perspirant to help with that nasty stinky sweat problem. The best smell is no smell at all.

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